Looking for Lucia in Denver and Boulder, Colorado
Friends, family and the first snow of the year on the ninth stop of my Lucia Berlin research trip
Hello, friends —
The ninth stop on my journey in Lucia Berlin’s footsteps was actually two stops: Denver and Boulder, Colorado. Lucia taught Creative Writing at CU Boulder from the mid-1990s until shortly before her death, and she also spent lots of time in Denver, often with her dear friends Ed and Jennifer Dunbar Dorn.
It’s taken me a while to write this Colorado letter because the end of my literary road trip really took it out of me, in every sense. I’m back home now, in Princeton, writing to you from bed — I still haven’t got my energy back, and looking in the mirror the other day, I noticed that streaks of my hair had turned white while I was on the road.
I guess a two-month journey across three countries and seventeen cities is bound to age you — especially when the life you’re researching involved so much trauma. I’m so sad for Lucia sometimes, I can barely move. Is there such a thing as biographer’s blues?
So if I owe you an email or a message — and I owe so many of you! — please forgive me. I’ll write back as soon as I get my spirits up.
First Impression
I arrived in Colorado just before the first snow. ‘You should have been here last week,’ said one Uber driver after another, ‘it was like summer!’
Now, the skies were heavy and thick, and the roads were slick with ice. On my second morning in Boulder, I woke up in my basement Airbnb to find snow piled high against the window, blocking out the light. I was so tired I could hardly get out of bed, but on my walk to and from the supermarket, the bright red leaves of the maple trees and the blue sky dazzled me, and I felt a bit better.
Best Moment
The best thing to happen to me in Colorado was definitely Jennifer Dunbar Dorn — one of Lucia’s closest friends (along with her husband Ed Dorn), whom I write about in my recent Paris Review piece. She had me to stay in her spare room in Denver, and when she picked me up from the airport I nearly cried with relief. I know that’s pathetic, but after two months of travel, one hurricane, a dozen delayed flights, a billion logistical nightmares, and zero days off, it felt wonderful to be looked after.
Jennifer then made me the most delicious chicken for dinner, which I have tried to replicate using this recipe, but I think she must use a secret ingredient because it’s definitely not the same.
Staying at Jennifer’s house, where Lucia had visited her and Ed so many times, moved me deeply. It’s a lovely old building, full of books and light, with lots of framed poems and magazine covers on the walls, and art by their friends, and political posters, and photographs of family and loved ones. It had been such a long time since I’d been home myself, and I really felt at home there. Jennifer is excellent company, and I’m very grateful to Lucia for bringing us together.
The next morning, Jennifer took me to visit Lucia and Ed’s graves in Boulder: they’re buried in the Green Mountain Cemetery, side by side. I can’t imagine a prettier or more peaceful place to rest.
Worst Moment
I had my first migraine (I think) in Boulder, the day after the snow.
Last Impression
I’m so grateful for the hospitality of Lucia’s family and friends in Colorado — Jennifer, of course, but also Lucia’s wonderful former students Staci Amend, Erika Krouse, Ashley Shires and Jenny Shank (click on their names to read about their fabulous work). They all took time out of their weekends to share their memories of Lucia and show me around… A highlight was drinking margaritas with Staci in a bar where everyone except us was dressed in Wizard of Oz costumes for Hallowe’en. We had so much fun.
Final Thought
On my last day in Colorado, I had the privilege of meeting Lucia’s nephew Patricio Chirinos Brown and his very kind (and chic) family, Paola and Patricio Jr. They couldn’t have been warmer or more welcoming to me: they even walked me to the train station and helped me to buy a ticket for the airport. It was lovely to see how excited they are to live in Denver: they showed me their favourite bridge, their favourite view, their favourite food hall, and their enthusiasm was infectious. Here they are!
Lucia was so loved, by so many people, and I feel very lucky to get to witness that love for myself when I meet each of them. I don’t think every biographer has that experience, and mine says a lot about my subject — about what an exceptional person she was, and about how many lives she touched.
I’ll write soon with a report on the final stop of my Lucia trip. In the meantime, thank you so much for coming with me!
Nina
x
'Safe & Sound' , Indeed. There you are, Nina. What a tour de force! I sniffled a bit (actually more than a bit) while reading your account of your stay in Denver to say adieu to the Dorns, Lucia's steadfast and beloved friends.
I can't tell you what your "Looking for Lucia" has meant to me. The rawness and honesty and your love for your subject are a special treat. And, of course, I adore your gift as a writer (here and elsewhere) I am planning to return to your pages throughout the rest of November, Lucia's 19th year, resting next to Ed Dorn in the cemetery in Boulder.
How lucky Lucia is to have you as her biographer, Nina! If you ever come to Ecuador, we will have a room with a view of the Pacific and meals to dream about--humbly bragged.
Take care and rest. I will have a special prayer for Lucia at Thanksgiving this year and you're included.
I'm so glad you're home and resting. Nina! That was an amazing feat. It must be exhausting to travel back and forth across two continents, braving hurricanes and snowstorms, but to be meeting so many people, researching and recording and writing all the time, that must really have drained you. Still, it was such a pleasure to have you looking for Lucia in Colorado! Thank you!